Posts Tagged ‘George Orwell’

As I thaw out my South African wife experiencing her first dose of a Minnesota winter in six years, here are some links.

* Arrests have been made in the famous Lufthansa heist, immortalized in Goodfellas.

* A little family connection on this one. Nice piece in the Worthington Daily Globe by my old boss Doug Wolter on my uncle Mike Fury, the longtime women’s basketball coach at Minnesota West, and his assistant Rosalie Hayenga.

* Quiz: Guess famous SNL quotes from just an image or GIF.

* Story about George Orwell’s race to finish 1984 before he died.

* Ryan Leaf sabotaged his chances to get drafted by the Colts with the first pick.

* Everything that happened in Dr. Strangelove could actually have happened in real life.

* Is Justin Bieber turning into Corey Haim? I don’t know.

* Richard Sherman has gone from despised to respected this week. Here’s another take on the Seattle CB.

* The New York Times claims that ultra-marathon runners aren’t like normal people.

By Rich Jensen
Guest blogger

It was a bright warm day in September and the clocks were striking 13.

Texas A&M was in the SEC and Texas A&M was in the Big 12.

Nineteen Eighty-Four has come to college football, and it seems appropriate to provide a dictionary which will allow the average college football fan to translate the doublespeak coming from ADs, presidents, commissioners and coaches:

Accountable: Exempt ( )

Athletic Director: Primarily responsible for the performance of the football team ( )

Big Ten: A twelve team conference (at least for now)

Big Twelve: A ten team conference (at least for now)

Booster: One who discredits a university by supporting it ( )

Campus: Collection of buildings in the general vicinity of the football stadium. Students sometimes attend classes there when not engaged in football related activities ( )

Coach: Primarily responsible for the performance of the football team

Committed: Undecided ( )

Compliance Department: The department which approves rules infractions ( )

Enhanced Visibility: More TV money ( )

Increased Opportunities: More TV money ( )

Integrity: Cheating ( )

In Our Best Interests: More TV money ( )

NCAA: A rule enforcing body that profits from cheaters ( )

President: Primarily responsible for the performance of the football team ( )

Sanction: To discipline one person for the conduct of another ( )

Student-Athlete: An athlete who does not attend classes ( )

Support: Undermine ( )

Traditional: Disposable ( )

Soon the college landscape will be dominated by three major football conferences, and in true Orwellian fashion, their continued jockeying for supremacy will ensure a measure of stability, at least until TV revenues start to dry up:

So, get used to the doublespeak, the barefaced lies and the hypocrisy – if you’re not used to it already.

About the author: Jensen is a very smart guy and often applies that to sports. That is all.